Football is a funny old game. Except, if you're a Rochdale fan making your way back up to Lancashire at this moment in time. A few facts that have been banded about recently include Notts' defence being the meanest in all the leagues, Steve Cotterill is yet to lose in charge of Notts County and Rochdale have not been promoted since the invention of the wheel.
Today, Cotterill took his Magpies side to Sixfields to face the other inform team in League Two; Northampton Town. The Cobblers got turned over at Meadow Lane earlier in the season 5-2 but a lot has changed since then including the managers job at both clubs. Ian Sampson has guided the Cobblers from mid-table obscurity to play-off hopefuls whilst Steve Cotterill has turned County from free-flowing, promotion candidates to stubborn title favourites. Neither team had lost since February, so this was always going to be a close one.
Northampton were missing top scorer Akinfenwa, whilst their counterparts welcomed back John Thompson and Johnnie Jackson who was named amongst the substitutes.
The Cobblers dominated the first half with their dogged determination and desire to win the ball. These endeavours resulted in Northampton having 6 first half corners and the best chance of the half; a one-on-one situation between Steve Guinan and Kasper Schemiechel with the Notts 'keeper getting the upper hand and saving with his foot. A stubborn Notts defence restricted the rest of Northampton's chances to long-distance shots and corners. Meanwhile, at the other end an ineffective Luke Rodgers (who must surely have his eye on New York already) failed to combine with Lee Hughes and muster a shot to trouble Cobblers 'keeper, Steele.
Rodgers was replaced at half-time for cult-hero Delroy 'the face' Facey whose impact on the game must not be undervalued. Suddenly, Notts had an outlet - one who could hold the ball up instead of simply letting it bounce off him. A ball straight into the Cobblers' area at the start of the second half led to a defensive blunder by Craig Hinton; allowing Ben Davies to take control of the ball and place it into the far corner with his left foot for his 14th of the campaign.
The lead was nearly short-lived as a Guttridge shot found its way goal-bound after Schmeichel failed to punch away successfully. Fortunately, Graeme Lee spared the Danish star and managed to hack the ball away and keep the score at 1-0.
Notts could have doubled the lead after brilliant work from Delroy Facey down the left who managed to get a cross off and straight onto Hughes' head, but the County top scorer was unfortunate to see his header hit Steele and with the rebound Hughes, once again; found Steele in his way. Notts managed to hold out for a vital 3 points as fellow title-chasers Rochdale capitulated away to Torquay and were hit for 5 without reply. Notts are now 3 points closer to Dale and the title.
You pies!
Saturday 10 April 2010
Monday 5 April 2010
Away Days - Shrewsbury
In the middle of what seemed to be a Shropshire hurricane Notts were able to overcome the task of beating play-off hopefuls Shrewsbury Town. The Shrews hadn't won in 5; whilst County hadn't lost in 11 games. The stadium had echoes of Rushden & Diamonds' soulless, generic Lego stadium. As for the Shrewsbury fans they are possibly the most bitter, spiteful and uninspiring 'supporters' I've had the misfortune to witness. The Shrews fans concentrated their minimal brain capacity on insulting the County players, hierarchy and even singling out individual fans for the duration of the 90 minutes instead of getting behind their team so the 'worst fans of the season' award has swapped hands from Bury to Shrewsbury in the matter of a week. Maybe if they had focussed their energies on supporting their team instead of their juvenile attempts at banter then maybe they could have lifted their team out of their slump. But in line with current form Notts were able to keep their 9th clean sheet in 10 games under Cotterill with a 1-0 win.
Notts were unchanged from the side who hit Bury for 5 on Saturday. This meant that there was no starting place for Karl Hawley or Delroy Facey with the out-of-form Luke Rodgers keeping his place.
A rasping volley from Simpson stung Kasper's palms with the Shrews best chance of the half. Notts soon grew into their own and but for the goalkeeping of Button, Notts may have been in front on 20 minutes, a Lee Hughes header troubled the Shrews defence with Button scrambling across his goal and turning the header around the post. Hughes came close again with a low shot that flew inches past the post prior to Neil Bishop having a shot that demanded another good save. The Notts goal came on 36 minutes from former Shrewsbury midfield dynamo Ben Davies, after good work from Westcarr down the left who managed to cut the ball across the box which was left when skillfully dummied by Luke Rodgers, before falling to Lee Hughes who rolled it into Ben Davies' path, who composed himself before blasting the ball past Button.
The second half was a dire affair with the wind having the upper hand over either team. Notts persisted with the long ball but with the lwind against them, Shrewsbury were able to have sustained pressure with neither Hughes or Rodgers able to hold the ball up. Shrewsbury nearly pulled themselves level when an ambitious lob nearly caught Schmeichel out in the County goal, but fortunately for the Magpies the effort was just off target. Notts' best opportunity in the second half, again fell to Ben Davies but this time, Button was equal to the shot from 10 yards. Shrewsbury had neither the guile or quality to break down to the stern Notts defence; as Karl Hawley came on and helped Notts retain the ball better in the Shrews half. The 1-0 scoreline was a fair reflection on a close game played in awful conditions.
Notts' dreams of pipping Rochdale to the title are becoming more and more like reality with every passing game. You pies!
Notts were unchanged from the side who hit Bury for 5 on Saturday. This meant that there was no starting place for Karl Hawley or Delroy Facey with the out-of-form Luke Rodgers keeping his place.
A rasping volley from Simpson stung Kasper's palms with the Shrews best chance of the half. Notts soon grew into their own and but for the goalkeeping of Button, Notts may have been in front on 20 minutes, a Lee Hughes header troubled the Shrews defence with Button scrambling across his goal and turning the header around the post. Hughes came close again with a low shot that flew inches past the post prior to Neil Bishop having a shot that demanded another good save. The Notts goal came on 36 minutes from former Shrewsbury midfield dynamo Ben Davies, after good work from Westcarr down the left who managed to cut the ball across the box which was left when skillfully dummied by Luke Rodgers, before falling to Lee Hughes who rolled it into Ben Davies' path, who composed himself before blasting the ball past Button.
The second half was a dire affair with the wind having the upper hand over either team. Notts persisted with the long ball but with the lwind against them, Shrewsbury were able to have sustained pressure with neither Hughes or Rodgers able to hold the ball up. Shrewsbury nearly pulled themselves level when an ambitious lob nearly caught Schmeichel out in the County goal, but fortunately for the Magpies the effort was just off target. Notts' best opportunity in the second half, again fell to Ben Davies but this time, Button was equal to the shot from 10 yards. Shrewsbury had neither the guile or quality to break down to the stern Notts defence; as Karl Hawley came on and helped Notts retain the ball better in the Shrews half. The 1-0 scoreline was a fair reflection on a close game played in awful conditions.
Notts' dreams of pipping Rochdale to the title are becoming more and more like reality with every passing game. You pies!
Sunday 4 April 2010
Champion Elects?
Ian McParland; Michael Johnson; Hans Backe; Dave Kevan & Steve Cotterill have all been in the dugout for Notts County in this turbulant season which makes their current position even more remarkable. Meanwhile, their Lancashire rivals; Rochdale - have had a very quiet, efficient season, ploughing their way towards the title. It was in the last week of February that new chairman Ray Trew declared that the ex-Burnley and Cheltenham man would be taking charge of the Magpies until the end of the current season. Not one Notts fan would have dared imagine what was in store for the next month. When Cotterill took over Notts were occupying the last play-off place 14 points behind leaders Rochdale. County hadn't won in 4 games including a defeat away at promotion-chasing Bournemouth and dropping points at home to struggling Grimsby Town. These results, combined with the uncertainty of whether the club would sink into administration had Notts fans worried. Now, on Easter Sunday, a day before Notts travel down to promotion-hopefuls Shrewsbury they are sitting pretty in second place. It is not only the grit, determination and organisation that Cotterill has installed since he took charge but the modesty and professionalism which is lacking from Keith Hill's locker (after his rant on Sky during the broadcast of Notts - v - Bournemouth).
One of the main contrasts since Cotterill started his reign as Notts manager is the defence. Eight clean sheets out of a possible nine has helped Notts' rise to the upper echelons of the league. The team have inflicted 5-0 home defeats upon Hereford and Bury, but it is not all flambuoyance. It is the dedication and the willingness to work for the other man which has seen Notts pick up precious 1-0 wins against Chesterfield, Rotherham, Crewe and Macclesfield. Notts also claimed a 3-0 win against Accrington Stanley (the only team thus far to beat Notts on their own patch). A last-minute goal from Bournemouth substitute Jeff Goulding secured a point for the visitors in a 2-2 draw. Notts also failed to finish off Bradford at Valley Parade as they dominated without any reward besides taking a point back from Yorkshire after a goaless game.
Notts' eighth clean sheet of Cotterill's reign came against an out-of-form Bury who hadn't scored from open play in 7 games. This statistic would not have been feasible to even the most imaginable fan in November after an enthralling 3-3 draw at Gigg Lane after a mud patch had spared Notts' blushes (see video below).
But the Shakers' lack of confidence was evident as Mike Edwards put Notts into a 1-0 lead and after Kasper pulled off a magnificent save, low down to his right; there was only going to be one winner. Craig Westcarr added a second at the beginning of the second half with a side-footed finish after good work by Luke Rodgers down the left-hand side. Ben Davies effectively finished the game off after a move that would not have looked out of place in the Premiership. Lee Hughes and Delroy Facey put the gloss on the scoreline and had it not been for Cotterill replacing Davies, Hughes & Rodgers - Notts may have added even more to the scoreline.
Cotterill is definitely not getting carried away with the win though.
One of the main contrasts since Cotterill started his reign as Notts manager is the defence. Eight clean sheets out of a possible nine has helped Notts' rise to the upper echelons of the league. The team have inflicted 5-0 home defeats upon Hereford and Bury, but it is not all flambuoyance. It is the dedication and the willingness to work for the other man which has seen Notts pick up precious 1-0 wins against Chesterfield, Rotherham, Crewe and Macclesfield. Notts also claimed a 3-0 win against Accrington Stanley (the only team thus far to beat Notts on their own patch). A last-minute goal from Bournemouth substitute Jeff Goulding secured a point for the visitors in a 2-2 draw. Notts also failed to finish off Bradford at Valley Parade as they dominated without any reward besides taking a point back from Yorkshire after a goaless game.
Notts' eighth clean sheet of Cotterill's reign came against an out-of-form Bury who hadn't scored from open play in 7 games. This statistic would not have been feasible to even the most imaginable fan in November after an enthralling 3-3 draw at Gigg Lane after a mud patch had spared Notts' blushes (see video below).
But the Shakers' lack of confidence was evident as Mike Edwards put Notts into a 1-0 lead and after Kasper pulled off a magnificent save, low down to his right; there was only going to be one winner. Craig Westcarr added a second at the beginning of the second half with a side-footed finish after good work by Luke Rodgers down the left-hand side. Ben Davies effectively finished the game off after a move that would not have looked out of place in the Premiership. Lee Hughes and Delroy Facey put the gloss on the scoreline and had it not been for Cotterill replacing Davies, Hughes & Rodgers - Notts may have added even more to the scoreline.
Cotterill is definitely not getting carried away with the win though.
Wednesday 10 February 2010
Hurrah!
After days upon days of turmoil, I have finally stopped shaking in my rocking chair under my electric blanket and plucked up the courage to write another delightful sample of waffle.
Since the last article Ray Trew has assumed control of Notts County F.C and appointed a new Chief Executive - the controversial Jim Rodwell formerly of Boston United and a new manager Steve Cotterill; former employee of Burnley and Cheltenham Town. Cotterill, known for his turgid formations and stability will be welcomed by the Notts faithful who have had to endure more ups and downs in the past week than Hugh Hefner's member has in his 39520 year lifespan. Ray Trew also announced today that Notts County shall not be placed into administration even though it was the right thing to do in a business sense.
This came as a massive relief to myself as I had feared I would have to make more trips to Stanley's squalor or Chesterfield's well, erm field.
One good thing has came out of this whole shambles - Ben Davies. I would piggyback this man to the matches and back whilst reciting the entire bible from start to finish. What this would achieve I'm not too sure. But this man isn't human. Torquay, Aldershot, Wigan, Dagenham, Macclesfield & Barnet have all had free-kicks put past them by the David Beckham of the lower leagues.
Since the last article Ray Trew has assumed control of Notts County F.C and appointed a new Chief Executive - the controversial Jim Rodwell formerly of Boston United and a new manager Steve Cotterill; former employee of Burnley and Cheltenham Town. Cotterill, known for his turgid formations and stability will be welcomed by the Notts faithful who have had to endure more ups and downs in the past week than Hugh Hefner's member has in his 39520 year lifespan. Ray Trew also announced today that Notts County shall not be placed into administration even though it was the right thing to do in a business sense.
This came as a massive relief to myself as I had feared I would have to make more trips to Stanley's squalor or Chesterfield's well, erm field.
One good thing has came out of this whole shambles - Ben Davies. I would piggyback this man to the matches and back whilst reciting the entire bible from start to finish. What this would achieve I'm not too sure. But this man isn't human. Torquay, Aldershot, Wigan, Dagenham, Macclesfield & Barnet have all had free-kicks put past them by the David Beckham of the lower leagues.
Sunday 7 February 2010
Revelations at Meadow Lane
'Digga' has been prodding and poking his overly large nose in and around the recycling bins behind the back of the Main Stand where Peter Trembling's office is located and can exclusively reveal the true meaning of Munto Finance and just how Notts County paid off half of their HMRC tax bill.
The answer is not an obvious one to the unsuspecting eye. Drugs. Suspicions were raised when Sven took the Mexican national team job and even more so when he arrived at East Midlands Airport one morning in July. But there was a link unbeknown to the mass population; Munto Finance. Munto Finance stands for nothing other than Marijuana; Under Nines Team Operation. Digga dug deeper and more ferociously than ever and managed to hack into Sven's Blackberry via telekinesis and pulled out a blueprint made on Paint. The blueprint contained maps of various alleyways and escape routes of the surrounding Meadows and St Anns area and an order number for Ikea's finest D.I.Y BMX's.
Munto Finance's only purchase in their time at Notts County was "Pitch Heating Lights" which were claimed to "help defrost grass" and "aid Notts County's plight in beating the cold weather" - Notts County had to postpone home games against Grimsby, Barnet and Forest Green Rovers. The only things these lights were good for were growing industrial amounts of Cannabis.
'Digga' then pursued former Notts County prodigy Mark Draper who has been given the job title of 'Kit Man'. Draper refused to comment on any of these allegations but was seen giving a parcel to youth team starlet Juan Martinez (a new signing from Bolivia) who questioned Draper "are they dry enough yet?" to which Draper replied with a swift backhand and ushered the young man away.
Notts County's ex manager Ian McParland nickname 'Charlie' because of his minor cocaine operation was knocked off by Tord Grip in October after Sven had given his assistant the nod. The reason Sven gave for this move was that "they were not working closely enough together" which one would presume means Charlie was dealing with rival gangs across the river known as Nottingham Forest. Named after their once huge Cannabis operation; their grow patch was rumoured to be visible from space.
Will the next crop be ready in time for the next HMRC hearing? Will ten-bags be enough to save Notts County from administration? We will see.
This article may be factually inaccurate.
The answer is not an obvious one to the unsuspecting eye. Drugs. Suspicions were raised when Sven took the Mexican national team job and even more so when he arrived at East Midlands Airport one morning in July. But there was a link unbeknown to the mass population; Munto Finance. Munto Finance stands for nothing other than Marijuana; Under Nines Team Operation. Digga dug deeper and more ferociously than ever and managed to hack into Sven's Blackberry via telekinesis and pulled out a blueprint made on Paint. The blueprint contained maps of various alleyways and escape routes of the surrounding Meadows and St Anns area and an order number for Ikea's finest D.I.Y BMX's.
Munto Finance's only purchase in their time at Notts County was "Pitch Heating Lights" which were claimed to "help defrost grass" and "aid Notts County's plight in beating the cold weather" - Notts County had to postpone home games against Grimsby, Barnet and Forest Green Rovers. The only things these lights were good for were growing industrial amounts of Cannabis.
'Digga' then pursued former Notts County prodigy Mark Draper who has been given the job title of 'Kit Man'. Draper refused to comment on any of these allegations but was seen giving a parcel to youth team starlet Juan Martinez (a new signing from Bolivia) who questioned Draper "are they dry enough yet?" to which Draper replied with a swift backhand and ushered the young man away.
Notts County's ex manager Ian McParland nickname 'Charlie' because of his minor cocaine operation was knocked off by Tord Grip in October after Sven had given his assistant the nod. The reason Sven gave for this move was that "they were not working closely enough together" which one would presume means Charlie was dealing with rival gangs across the river known as Nottingham Forest. Named after their once huge Cannabis operation; their grow patch was rumoured to be visible from space.
Will the next crop be ready in time for the next HMRC hearing? Will ten-bags be enough to save Notts County from administration? We will see.
This article may be factually inaccurate.
Saturday 6 February 2010
Forgotten Men & World Cup Worries
After watching Manchester United's second goal against Portsmouth in a 5-0 drubbing at Old Trafford in which the ball travelled into the net at a ferocious speed of about 1MPH it reminded me of the Manchester United 'keeper who let that awful goal in through his legs. After several tense minutes of google corrections and numerous "did you means" I found out it was none other than the legendary Massimo Taibi (who?). The shot was from Le Tissier as can be seen in this HD video - it's followed by that dreadful cat video.
After I had got over how awful that attempt at a save was; it dawned on me that England have roughly 1.3 competent goalkeepers who could wear the jersey in South Africa who would stand at least a slight chance of not being an absolute catastrophe. The first is Manchester City goalkeeper Joe Hart who is on loan at Birmingham City and helped them to a 15 match unbeaten run and let's be honest - anyone who plays behind Lee Bowyer and manages to achieve that must be something special. The 0.3 is for Chris Kirkland he would count for a whole person except 70% of his body is made up of matchsticks and glue. The other keepers David James, Scott Carson, Robert Green, Ben Foster and Paul Robinson are playing and not standing out in teams like Portsmouth and West Brom for a reason - they're not good enough.
After I had got over how awful that attempt at a save was; it dawned on me that England have roughly 1.3 competent goalkeepers who could wear the jersey in South Africa who would stand at least a slight chance of not being an absolute catastrophe. The first is Manchester City goalkeeper Joe Hart who is on loan at Birmingham City and helped them to a 15 match unbeaten run and let's be honest - anyone who plays behind Lee Bowyer and manages to achieve that must be something special. The 0.3 is for Chris Kirkland he would count for a whole person except 70% of his body is made up of matchsticks and glue. The other keepers David James, Scott Carson, Robert Green, Ben Foster and Paul Robinson are playing and not standing out in teams like Portsmouth and West Brom for a reason - they're not good enough.
Away Days - Blundell Park
Here are two facts you may not know about Grimsby Town's Blundell Park. Fact number one; the away stand is among the most irritating stands in the United Kingdom. No matter where you sit past the third row you will have some form of structural pillar obscuring part of the pitch and have to bob and weave to follow the action - this is especially annoying when you're wedged in between two people who have delved into a Big Mac at the McDonald's near the ground after having an appetiser of fish and chips beforehand. The second is that is used to be a PoW camp. Now, I can almost hear the disbelief so it's probably a good job I took a picture of the gun tower and the surrounding walls.
Now they have cleverly disguised these as a floodlight and a normal wall to fool the unsuspecting public, but Digga (no link to the 'Digger' at the Guardian) has found proof that Tommy Wright the 'Grimsby Marksman' is being trained as a special ops agent. His training included a stamp on Neil Bishop as he lay on the floor and a forearm smash across Mike Edwards' face before pleading his innocence - a well equipped agent. Merciless in the field.
How do Grimsby get away with all this you ask? The answer is the mascot. Standing at approximately 6ft and resembling a slightly perverted sailor, he runs around the pitch pole dancing and goading the fans and in all fairness is erection-inspiringly entertaining when compared to Mr & Mrs Magpie; the geriatric Notts mascots who have to get St.John's paramedics to carry them off just prior to kick-off just in case they snuff it.
The game was in all seriousness a battle. Neither team looked like they wanted to lose with the referee taking exception to the Notts players and brandishing yellow cards for running in an incorrect manner and leaving the SAS trainee Wright to storm around the pitch like the school bully who is playing on the losing team. Exceptional last-ditch tackles by Stephen Hunt and Neil Bishop in either half stopped the Mariners most threatening attacks whilst Lee Hughes was biding his time at the other end. The one clear cut chance that fell to Notts' leading scorer was gleefully snatched up as Hughes raced onto a Kasper Schmeichel kick and blasted in past Nick Colgan to give the Magpies their 8th win out of a possible 9.
Now they have cleverly disguised these as a floodlight and a normal wall to fool the unsuspecting public, but Digga (no link to the 'Digger' at the Guardian) has found proof that Tommy Wright the 'Grimsby Marksman' is being trained as a special ops agent. His training included a stamp on Neil Bishop as he lay on the floor and a forearm smash across Mike Edwards' face before pleading his innocence - a well equipped agent. Merciless in the field.
How do Grimsby get away with all this you ask? The answer is the mascot. Standing at approximately 6ft and resembling a slightly perverted sailor, he runs around the pitch pole dancing and goading the fans and in all fairness is erection-inspiringly entertaining when compared to Mr & Mrs Magpie; the geriatric Notts mascots who have to get St.John's paramedics to carry them off just prior to kick-off just in case they snuff it.
The game was in all seriousness a battle. Neither team looked like they wanted to lose with the referee taking exception to the Notts players and brandishing yellow cards for running in an incorrect manner and leaving the SAS trainee Wright to storm around the pitch like the school bully who is playing on the losing team. Exceptional last-ditch tackles by Stephen Hunt and Neil Bishop in either half stopped the Mariners most threatening attacks whilst Lee Hughes was biding his time at the other end. The one clear cut chance that fell to Notts' leading scorer was gleefully snatched up as Hughes raced onto a Kasper Schmeichel kick and blasted in past Nick Colgan to give the Magpies their 8th win out of a possible 9.
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